Cob: Re: Public (coblist) discussion of private issues

[Ocean]

Hello BB,

Since you chose to publish this marital issue publicly on the list, I 
responded likewise.  I thought others could gain from your dilemma and 
my suggestion of a reasonable solution.

By your public posting, I assumed you didn't feel embarrassed about it, 
but I guess you just wanted to show everyone how your wife was being a 
jerk...this is too bad, I hate it when anyone uses their partner's 
feelings "in jest".  How does she feel about your postings, your 
ridicule of her in a public forum?  Oh, she doesn't know? Well, how 
would she feel if she knew?  Do you care?

Whether in jest or not, whether she knows what you're writing about her 
or not, my response to you and anyone else listing such a problem would 
be the same.  Conflict in marriage or any relationship needs to be 
worked out.  There is nothing to gain by letting it fester or trying to 
sweep it under the rug.

 From your prior emails, I'm not surprised your wife is having difficulty 
dealing with your "ideas".

But maybe she's a just a jerk...

If you don't want to discuss your marriage in public, KEEP IT OFF THE 
LIST.  I'm sure your wife (and many others) would appreciate it.

Ocean

On Tuesday, August 20, 2002, at 10:02 PM, baco at pacinfo wrote:

> Ocean- Wow- you are so intuitive to gather all of that from so little 
> information contained in a jesting email.
>
>  
>
> What does your intuition tell you that I am thinking about your choice 
> to post all of that publicly?
>
>  
>
> BB
>
>  
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: owner-coblist at deatech.com [mailto:owner-coblist at deatech.com]On 
> Behalf OfOcean
> Sent: Tuesday, August 20, 2002 11:41 AM
> To: coblist at deatech.com
> Subject: Cob: Re: Anti-cob marital discord, American marketeering, etc.
>
>  
>
> Wow,
>
> Brian, that comment from your wife sounds like a threat, and seems 
> perhaps an expression of greater pent up frustration regarding things 
> other than your "new" interest in cob. I would suggest you and she have 
> a heartfelt conversation about what you are both happy and unhappy with 
> about with your marriage, and if you can't do that, some marriage 
> counseling seems in order.
>
> Beyond that, I think the best way to convince cob skeptics is to show 
> them...you guessed it...The Book! Especially the full color photo 
> spread, which has some gorgeous cob buildings which rival "Better 
> Homes". Even better, visiting a FINISHED (very important) cob is worth 
> far more than a 1000 words. Why don't you jet down to Cob Cottage 
> Company and show her Linda & Ianto's Heart House, the courtyard walls, 
> and the beautiful Bench Rocket Stove they installed in the main house 
> (a conventional structure).
>
> That's what convinced me...I was a cob skeptic too before visiting Cob 
> Co!
>
> ;-)
> Ocean
>
> On Tuesday, August 20, 2002, at 12:41 AM, baco at pacinfo wrote:
>
> Well maybe we have discovered a whole new impediment to natural 
> building. I
> was telling my wife how interested I am in building a cob studio and 
> setting
> up my kiln, wood working equipment, and music stuff in it. She said "why
> didn't you tell me about all of this before I married you?"
>
> Maybe I have been misdirected in my concerns over engineering standards-
> what cob needs is a concerted marketing campaign. How can we use Product
> Positioning to associate cob structures with Tommy Hilfigar sweatshirts?
>
> Maybe we could grind up the designer clothes to supplement straw.
>
> Any other ideas for good ol' American marketing?
>
> Brian Bray
> Eugene Oregon
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: owner-coblist at deatech.com [mailto:owner-coblist at deatech.com]On 
> Behalf
> Of W
> Sent: Monday, August 19, 2002 3:21 PM
> To: coblist at deatech.com
> Subject: Re: Cob: sacrilege
>
> There is an aerosol product on the market purely intended to reproduce 
> that
> "new car smell" - I can't imagine how toxic it might be. Just goes to 
> show
> how far our species has "evolved" ...maybe not... ;)
> ---
> PeaceLoveLightLifeBeautyTruth
> W.
>
> "Democracy in a Capitalist Republic is like Socialism in a Communist
> Dictatorship"
> ---
> This email address and other personal information is not available for
> commercial use of any kind, nor is it available for sale, trade, share 
> or
> any other form of exchange.
>
>
>
>
> On Mon, 19 Aug 2002 22:57:03
> John Russell wrote:
>
> Hi All,
>
> <snip>
>
> As an aside, I mentioned my interest in cob and natural
> building to my wife, her reaction to living in a cob house was, "Ewww,
> it would smell of dirt. " I guess we could always inport some petrol
> fumes and plastic smells, perhaps a discrete dispenser in a corner of
> the living room ;)
>
>
>
>
> Is your boss reading your email? ....Probably
> Keep your messages private by using Lycos Mail.
> Sign up today at http://mail.lycos.com
>
>
Ocean Liff-Anderson

Steward of Ahimsa Sanctuary (check out our newly updated website!!!!!)
http://www.peacemaking.org

Owner/Manager of Intaba's Kitchen (best food and coolest cob ambiance on 
the west coast!)
http://www.intabas.com
>
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